Stop Hiding From Yourself...

He has always thought that this motivational course is useless because he feels that motivation should come from the heart not by people talking to students. But he went ahead anyway, together with his class. The first day of the course started when this man presented himself with confidence and arrogance in front of the audience. He walked for a while, watching each and every pair of eyes looking at him. And then he introduced himself. From the time he started he did not mention that there will be lecturing or practicing just talking and listening intently. He thought, “Alright, we will see.” From the minute he started, his mouth never stops for more than three hours straight, joking around and it looked as if he was digressing most of the time instead of getting straight to the point. He laughed at his silly jokes of course and thought, “Alright, this is different.” The whole day just involved laughter, smiles and joy. His spirits was lifted up somehow but only by a fraction. The mentor told, “I want you to do one thing when you arrive home. Just three simple words, I love you. Say it to your parents, alright.” When he arrived at home, he did not say it.

The second day went on smoothly like yesterday with one particular exception. The mentor asked, “Did you do what I asked you to do yesterday?” Some put their hands up but majority kept their hands down. Furious, he started to flare, “What is up with this attitude? I just asked you to say that three simple words to your parents and you did not even give a damn about it!” The lights in the room were switched off. He continued, “Do you know that what I asked you to do will give so much to your parents. Just think about it, all of you in this room are champions. Among millions of the sperms from your father, you swam all the way to fertilize your mother’s egg. You only have twenty four hours or you will die. And do you know that the distance to be covered in human context it is as if running from Sentosa to upper Thailand? Just think about it, why you managed to fertilize the egg instead of the other millions. It is because you are the best of them all. Everyone in this room, listen up, you are champions. During labour; your mother experience excruciating pain, half of your mother’s feet in on earth, the other in her grave. Every time your mother gives birth, half of her life force is drained out. And the one thing she wants was to hear your cry. She would even sacrifice herself or undergo caesarian so that you will be born into this world. Nine months you give her pain and worry if you will turn out to be a normal embryo. Your father, he worked his guts out to provide for the family. He may not be able to express his feelings, but deep down he cares. Just imagine how hurtful for him when you ignored him, when you cursed him because he discipline you harshly. One day when your father is buying something you like, he met with a fatal accident and time just stops. How will you feel? The breadwinner is gone forever not having the opportunity to feel your love, to receive your apology. You just do not know that parents loved you so much, supported you since you are young and this is the way you repay their kindness, with ingratitude and hate! You will beg and cry and scream out loud should your parents die right now in this moment and there is nothing you can do to stop it.”

He cried and cried, hiding his face under his arms, ashamed and guilty. He continued, “You lie to your parents, blame them, complain about them but in reality, you are just giving excuses, you are the reason why you lie, you blame, you complain. Stop hiding behind you mask, stop hiding from yourself! We are all human living in a less than perfect world, so accept it, but do not give up that you are unable to achieve your goals in life. When you take off your mask, you believe in yourself, you give a hundred percent, you ignored what people say about you, you cherish those around you, you don’t feel ashamed, you become who you truly are. So, open up to your parents, to your friends, to your teachers and to yourself. Do what is right and your goals can be achieved only if you persevere, be yourself and you have people to back you up. Parents may hurt us in some ways, but we should move on, learn to forgive and forget, leave the past behind, act in the present and dream about you future, that is life!” His heart just felt as if a lightning had struck him, cries and whines were heard across the room, every single one of them broke into tears, they cannot lie that they are strong anymore, they are weak. They admit their mistakes; they learn to be humble, to feel inferior. To him it meant so much because he has not made the best of his life at least appreciate his parents especially to his father who was working overseas, only visiting him once in three to four months. To his classmates who he thought are just individuals, pretending they are friends. To the people he knew who he has not expressed his true feelings about them. He felt hurt and regretful. He never knew this kind of feeling, neither everyone in the room. It was tears that wiped away their sorrow, guilt, regret and pain. He came out of the room, reborn and rejuvenated. But the real test was yet to come.

The third day came along; parents were gathered in the hall together with the students one late evening. The mentor started explaining what has been going on for the last few days but he did not mentioned that we cried. He then said, “Parents, now I would like some of your children here to come up and give their testimonial about you, their teachers, their friends and most importantly themselves. This is their time to grow up.” Some people went upstage and gave their speech. He sat watching them one by one appeared on stage being honest to themselves with his heart aching. “I want to go and make my parents proud, to tell them that I have overcome my dreadful past and turn over a new chapter in my life.” He finally went up to stage when third speaker ended her speech. He came unprepared with a speech but he knew as long as he is true to himself, the words will find its way out and reach out to the hearts of those who listen to him. True enough, his class cheered him on, giving him the drive to give it all. He knew, some of them would never thought that he would do something like this, courageously address the audience in front of his parents, the principal and the vice principal, the teachers who taught him this year, the other two classes and other people’s parents. This was the moment he knew he did not want to miss out because this is the time to shine, to grow up, to put an end of hiding behind his mask and be himself. In front of so many people, he asked his mother who was only present then to stand up while he gave his speech. He told her how much he loved her. He asked his teachers to stand up as well, telling them about his ambition that he would give a hundred percent for them and to express his gratitude. He then explained about his father, “The symbol that I have chosen is my father. He may not hear me because he is not here today. But from young, I have always looked up to him. He may not show his love for me but I know he will be there when I need him most. He taught me to me who I am today and without my father and my mother, I would not be here today. When I saw this school for the first time, I knew right away that I want to go here. There is something that attracts me which I cannot explain why and in this school I have met dedicated teachers who supported and guided me thus far.” He saw he mother crying. By then, he knew he has made his family proud of him and hundred pairs of eyes will be witnesses that he will grow up to leave this school with ‘A’s written in his certificate. His class cheered once again, but this time the others as well. He felt so high; he felt that he was a changed man. When the closing ceremony ended, his class gathered together to sing a song. The hall turned itself to blend with the night sky. He sang with all his heart, swaying together with his classmates. After which, he searched his mother and gave her a hug that he had never given him for seventeen years. And also he hugged his teachers who made a difference in his life. It was heartwarming, it was when he took off his mask, plucked up the courage he had never known he had and he made every single moment counts to express his feelings. It was more than experience, it was the moment to truth that he would like to share with those people important to him; it was more than he can ask for. He knew that it was perfect and only time to stop hiding from himself.

This story is based on real account of the author. The author would like to thank the mentors of this motivational camp, Mr Ramesh Muthusamy for giving him the drive to believe in himself and Ms Cherie Lim for sharing her life experience and conducting the camp. It is only when we believe in ourselves, great things we thought we never could have done, could happen in our lives wherever and whenever we wanted it to happen.